This morning

I come downstairs in the dark at five to six. The cat is desperate to be fed so I do that, otherwise there'll be no peace for anyone. I notice as I do that there is a big old spider sat on the wall above his bowl - one of those massive autumn ones that I don't like. On the way to get a glass to deal with him, my bare toe sends a headless mouse corpse skittering across the kitchen floor.

But I am Yogaman and nothing ruffles my calm. I escort the spider outside, dispose of mousey, roll out the mat and off we go.